Baby smell might be the sweetest thing ever. Until it begins to smell like sour milk. When my first baby was a few weeks old, she developed a cheesy aroma. Oh, it was ripe. I swear I was bathing her. Her ears were clean. I wiped up spit-up. I had checked her belly button, changed her clothes, and looked in her mouth. Where was that smell coming from?
Finally one day I was lying with her on the floor for “tummy time” and I caught a glimpse under her chin. Trapped in the creases of her neck was a thin layer of gray lint and a few fine hairs–and the source of the stench. A good swipe with the baby wipes, and she was smelling as all babies ought to smell.
I share that embarrassing story in the spirit of, “you don’t know what you don’t know.” I had no idea to look in her neck rolls for stink. But because nobody told me, I just didn’t know.
You can read all the “What to Expect” books but still be unprepared for so many different things. So here is my list of things I think every new mom should know, and things I found that made life easier. Add yours in the comments at the end.
Mom Care
The baby isn’t the only one who needs care. You do, too.
If you need any IV fluids while you’re in labor, you will probably get some swelling. Even if you managed to get through pregnancy without cankles (lucky!), be prepared for puffy feet and ankles for up to a couple of weeks after you bring your baby home. Compression stockings can help with that.
The fun thing about having excess fluids? They have to leave somehow, and one of the ways is insane night sweats. So be ready for those. Like maybe sleep on a towel. Thanks, postpartum hormones.
There is no thirst like breastfeeding thirst. I carry my 30 oz tumbler knockoff Yeti cup everywhere. When I got mine, many moons ago, there were only stainless steel ones, but now they come in so many colors. I found a white one here. And I use a straw because I like to enjoy life.
One of the most enjoyed gifts I received at my recent shower was new pajamas. Soft, breathable, and dark colored, with an adjustable drawstring waistband. After delivery it’s lovely to have something fresh and new to wear–that isn’t maternity and doesn’t taunt you by being too small.
Diapers
When you change a diaper, open the new diaper, and slide that puppy under the old one. If something starts leaking mid-change, you can quickly flip the new diaper up over baby’s bottom. Or front if you have a boy.
Unfold the ruffles around the legs. They catch more than you think they could.
Have a variety of diaper brands. Some moms will stock up thousands of a particular brand of diapers, only to find out their baby breaks out with that one, or they don’t fit right around baby’s chunky thighs, or only stayed in size 1 diapers for 2 weeks.
Here are my diaper brand observations:
- Aldi diapers are almost identical to Pampers
- Kirkland (Costco) diapers are almost identical to Huggies
- Huggies have been great for my thicker thigh babies
- Pampers have been great for my skinnier babies
- Luvs, Parent’s Choice (Walmart) and Up & Up (Target) brands seem to fit about the same. Luv’s has fragrance. These all seem to have inferior absorbency (imo), but they cost less.
The best wipes on the market are Costco’s store brand, Kirkland. It’s just a fact.
If your little one is consistently messing outside of his diaper, especially up the back, it’s time to go up a size in diapers.
Speaking of blow-outs, did you know the envelope shape of the collar of Onesie’s is not just because baby heads are disproportionately huge? It’s so that when there’s poo all up baby’s back, you can roll the clothing down over her shoulders, so you don’t have to pull the poopy mess over her head. I had my 3rd kid before I learned that.
My “Can’t Live Without” Items
My favorite breastfeeding accessory, called a Haakaa, is a brilliant milk catcher. If you don’t know already, there is a good deal of milk leakage. When baby is eating on one side, the other side gets all excited and leaks. Rather than just dripping into a pad or down your shirt, you can catch it and save it for Dad to feed one day.
Bonus: To keep the Haakaa from falling (or getting kicked) off, you can turn the cup inside out, then attach it, and unfold the cup to get good suction. The video of this trick (using a balloon) is much clearer than me trying to describe it discretely.
I don’t often recommend big things that you only use for a few months, but a bassinet has been worth it. A full sized crib is not easy to fit into our room where I want the baby to sleep for the first couple of months.
Having a Pack N Play is super helpful when you’re traveling and need something to fold and go. But for everyday use at home, having a bassinet that rolls from one room to another has been a life-saver. Theoretically you can move the Pack N Play, but what you don’t know until you try, is that they are about an inch wider than a standard door frame. So to move it, you have to close it and reassemble it in another room. Fine–unless the baby is napping in it and you just want to roll her down the hall into the living room.
It used to be a luxury, but now I consider a video monitor to be an essential. Being able to look at your baby to determine whether it’s a real cry or a whiney cry is priceless. It also comes in handy in the toddler years, when they may or may not be staying in their bed.
Sooner or later your little one will feel out of sorts and you’ll want to take her temperature. They don’t know how to hold something under their tongues, and under the armpit isn’t accurate for infants. I don’t like the rectal option, so when I came across the infrared thermometer that doesn’t even have to touch the baby’s head, I was sold. I found mine at Aldi, but basically the same one is on Amazon.
Expert resources
If you are struggling with understanding what your baby needs, you need to study Priscilla Dunston, the “Baby Whisperer.”. Babies have an instinctual sound for needs like “I’m hungry”, “I need to burp,” “I’m uncomfortable” and “I’m sleepy.” Don’t believe me? Watch this video from The Baby Whisperer on Oprah and see if you disagree. This literally changed the way I responded to my baby after watching it. I wish I knew about this before my first and second babies.
For excellent help with baby and toddler sleep, look up Cara, and her info at TakingCaraBabies.com. She sells classes but if you read her blog and follow her on Instagram, you will learn so much about how to get sleep at night, for free. (Some moms have said that if you struggle with breastfeeding, taking her courses you might have a drop in supply. Valid point, but she has options for exclusive breastfeeding.)
Finally, if you haven’t started getting some kind of grocery delivery, if it’s available in your area, when you have a new baby is the prime time to take advantage of it. I have been using Walmart Grocery pickup. Some of my friends use Instacart. Others have raved about Shipt.
You will find your own mom hacks
The great thing about launching out into being a mom is sometimes you get to figure things out on your own. All these tips and tricks came because somebody had to solve a problem. You will have ample opportunity to solve your own problems. The good news is you have Google and a host of other moms to ask.
Do you have an awesome mom hack? Do you have a problem you can’t seem to solve on your own? Let’s talk in the comments. We’re all in this mess together! Hopefully somebody brought snacks.
This is the fourth installment of my series, Letters to a First-Time Mom.
I also talk about Feeling Inadequate, Postpartum Hormones and Resentment. Stay tuned for a final post about breastfeeding.
For fun, enjoy my post about Postpartum Hair-Loss here.
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abundance